Wednesday, July 1, 2009

Hell of a week.

Well, I've pulled up stakes and made it to Burlington, ON a couple of days ago.  Finally, finally, finally, I've got a good bit of land between me and the south, for now at least. 
"Damn the Man" Hanrahan and myself packed a 17" foot U-Haul almost a week ago with all my useless odds and ends (RPG with Trotsky's face on it, poison tipped U-Locks, ect.) and headed west for The Old Dominion (Virginia) to stay with my dad in Lynchburg for a night.
Good times were had by all. Scott wiped at Wii tennis so I ripped his cable line right off the side of his trailer with the U-Haul. Oh well; maybe he can get it fixed with all the money he saved not paying my child support.
After Virginia we roared up the low valleys of Massachusetts to my mothers to store my pile of junk. We got stuck on the Taconic Parkway, a road in which our truck was restricted. Unfortunately, Mapquest doesn't account for truck drivers. I said damn it all and we zoomed onto the thin winding road through New York state, that is until a trooper pulled us over. I was fined with 25 dollars, which I balefully added to the cost of the truck, it's gas, and a storage place in Mass. I don't now if you've heard; living is expensive people.
Brandon came to pick me up in Mass. There was a hectic mix up getting "Hotter than a firing pan" Hanrahan to the Albany airport and an inexplicable loosing of my passport.   
But folks, without regaling you with too many of the in and outs of my woeful trails, I'll say I made it to Canada safe as a safe. That is until Berkshire county put out a warrant on me for unpaid taxes. Good God! I have to get to things in Mass to resolve the problem, but if I cross the border they'll slap me in cuffs for sure. 
Hells bells!
I'm in good spirits though. We set out for a week long canoe trip in northern Ontario, which is some of the prettiest land the crown managed to swipe from the natives.
I've been sending out short stories to small literary blogs and magazines, as well as doing a illustration for a poem anthology that I hope will bring in 100 dollars and a publishing cred in Canada.
Tonight we trolled all about Burlington to rifle through potential dumpsters. Many of the places here are newer and therefore under heavy lock-and-key. To be honest prospects looked poor. The bulk bin rendered me nothing but a  slimy bucket and a huge gash on my shin from slamming it onto the rusty corner of it's dumpster. I was downcast and peeved. Then the dump diving demon smiled on us and we found three prime dumpsters almost in a row.
At a health food store we dug out 2 bags of rice biscuits. Then from a fast food place we found fruit. But The heavy load was to come. In a mart dumpster we found:
8 containers of soy milk
10 Kool-laid   juices
three cinnamon roll tubes
2 bags of cashews
1 bag of chocolate covered nuts
several bags of pasta
and some other odds and ends

This was only a portion of a gigantic pile of perfectly good food. The bin was stuffed full of goodies. We were almost caught by a sketchy guy in a four door, quick thinking won me kiwi-blueberry drink for the week. 
 

1 comment:

Stanway said...

Oh, Ben... How I revel in the thoughts of your derelict lifestyle...